I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldnāt see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like āuhā¦hi?ā And she said āI made you, do you know that?ā And I nodded and she was like āI hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please donāt break my heartā. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Meanā¢ļø????
inspiration struck and would not let me go until i drew this
So a woman comes in to my work and asks to use the bathroom. Okay, normal. She happens to be a beautiful womanānot my type, but, you know, classically beautiful in the way that makes you a little bashful to talk to anyway.
She comes out a little bit later to say that the soap dispenser is empty. Sheās holding her hands upāpurple nail polishāclearly distressed by her exposure to filth and unwilling to touch anything until that can be fixed. I am nothing if not eager to help (knight complex) (beautiful) (purple nail polish) so I leap up and run to the supply room for the refill bottle.
I wedge the bathroom door open, you know, for her comfort, sheās standing there (beautiful) watching me, Iām silently pretending that she must be secretly impressed by my ring of keys (like the song), Iāve got a bit of a swagger on maybe (purple nail polish). I open the soap dispenser expecting an empty canister. It doesnāt look empty. I stick my fingers in (looks can be deceiving) and itās completely full, freshly refilled, now Iām suddenly aware that sheās still watching me over my shoulder and Iām sticking my fingers into a hole (purple nail polish) and ha-ha-ha, itās only a little suggestive with the soap, forget about it.
I struggle with the soap dispenser, sheās still watching me, I realize that whoever filled it last didnāt prime it. āI have to prime it,ā I say, for some reason I have to explain out loud (beautiful).
I reach for the, uh, tube at the bottom. It hangs down about four inches. Itās rubbery. Yielding. But, uh, firm. I have to. Squeeze it. Repeatedly. Sheās watching me still. Soap is leaking out of the release valve on the cap and onto my hands. Still no soap is coming out.
Thereās probably congealed soap near the tip blocking the opening, I realize, and try to covertly squeeze it to check. Like. An udder. Iām massaging it (purple nail polish) and sheās still watching me. I glance up in the mirror. Her expression behind me is unreadable. Her eyes are fixed on the little rubber phallus I am stroking. Iām sweating.
āI have toā¦ā I begin. I panic. I donāt know how to finish my sentence. I canāt say anything that can be construed as sexual. āā¦Milk it,ā I say. A mistake. Now it somehow sounds more sexual than if I had said ājack it offā. I could have played that as a roguish joke. Milk it doesnāt sound roguish, it sounds creepy. The clogged soap comes free. White translucent liquid soap spurts all over my hands. There is a terrible sound accompanying it. She says āeugh!ā over my shoulder. I try to rinse my hands and the soap container off with water before putting it away but soap just keeps leaking out, itās everywhere. Why does it have to be white? Why does it have to be this consistency? Why is the suspensor tube shapedā¦ like that (couldnāt it be just a little bit bigger if it had to be shaped Like That?) Why did she have to stand there watching me?
From here on out Iām just buying fucking pump bottles for the bathroom. Jesus fucking Christ.
I just.
You know.
I mean really look at it. I had it braced against my body because it was so slippery so like. Experience this horror with me in my shoes.
Important addition: OP deactivated the day after posting this.
itās so sad what happened to them. a damn shame.
happy normal fuckin day to everyone who doesnt celebrate christmas or rly any holidays today n tomorrow. hope you have an average day. hope its chill like any other
it’s been over 15 years and i still feel like kanna should’ve warned katara that the NWT didn’t allow women to learn waterbending for anything but healing. also kanna probably should’ve told katara ABOUT healing before going on a dangerous journey to the other side of the world.
Frankly suprise kanna never talked crap about that dude Pakku she ran away from so that when they get to the north Sokka and Katara can be like “ITS YOOOUUUUU!?!!?”
sokka: wait you’re that incel gran-gran ghosted?!?????
pakku: what language is that
In her defense 1. she was a non bender, so she might not have known about the “girls only learn healing” thing, 2. it’s been like sixty years since she left, it’s not unreasonable to assume they may have eased up what with the war, 3. given the fact that Katara almost got murdered for being a waterbender she’d probably keep quiet about what little info she knew so Katara wouldn’t try it and either injure herself or draw the fire nation’s attention, and finally 4. old people don’t talk about anything!!! my grandmother apparently wrote my grandfather a Dear John letter while he was stationed in the Pacific and almost married some rich guy from the east coast instead, and I didn’t even hear about this until after she died!!! I am completely unsurprised that she wouldn’t mention the fiance she dumped to her grandkids
It also doesnāt take much to make a trans person feel seen and validated
Iād like to reiterate that terfs and transphobes are not fucking allowed to reblog my shit. Stay the fuck away from my content and let me live my life while you live yours. Sorry you were raised to be hateful little dipshits and that you have nothing better to do with your time than leave pissbaby comments on other peopleās posts jfc
i know that the word ārecessā probably means something different in the adult world but its still very funny to see the headline ācongress takes a recess in the middle of covid relief discussionā
you guys have to stop being funnier than me on my own posts or else im gonna be out of a job
